It's only 5 days to Christmas.. no wait, make that 40 days until a big fat jolly man dressed in an ill-fitting red suit tries to squeeze himself down 6 billion chimneys in 24hrs. I know its cliched to say that Christmas has lost its true meaning... but really, we are more than 5 weeks away from Christmas and already I am all "Christmassed out". I'd like to find the little drummer boy and stick his drum so far up his stable that not even the 3 wise men will be able to find it - star or no star.
I planned on writing a post entitled "A Very Merry Home-Made Christmas" about my plans and reasons for making Christmas presents this year. But the more I thought about it, the more I realised the REAL reason(s) behind why I'm taking a stand this year and not buying (literally) into the whole hoopla that is the festive season.
For the last couple of weeks HeWhoCanDoNoWrong (HWCDNW) has been collecting and playing with empty boxes. Old party pack boxes, cereal boxes, shoe boxes and even a huge big "moving" box that he found at school the other day! Now I'm thinking why do I need to go out and buy some fancy expensive toy when for the last few weeks he hasn't looked at his 100 bakugans, his 5 ninja turtles, his Ben 10 watch, 1 million cars, blocks, bats, balls etc. What I really should be doing is popping down to the delivery section of any major retailer and filling my boot with empty boxes. I reckon that his presents could be sorted out in under 30 seconds and I won't even need to venture into a shop at all - BONUS!
I'm also not sure why most of us spend all year trying to loose weight "for summer" only to eat the equivalent of a weeks worth of food in one sitting. In general a fancy Sunday meal would consist of a roast chicken, potatoes and 3 veg. Dessert would be ice-cream and if I've been particularly industrious, perhaps a baked chocolate pudding. But come the 24th/25th of December, for some reason we think that our meal needs to consist of 3 types of meat, a vegetable in every colour, potatoes, rice, salad, tiny dinner rolls, stuffing, crackling and sauces in a variety of flavours... We all say we'll eat the leftovers, but let's face it, there are only so many gammon sandwiches one can eat before you literally and figuratively start looking like Miss Piggy.
....and don't get me started on crackers - which if you think about it are really just toilet rolls filled with the biggest load of crap covered in shiny paper. Oh yes, I forgot, it also goes "bang" if you pull the little piece of paper sticking out the end. Buying crackers also means that you get lumped with 8 ridiculous Christmas hats made from dyed crinkle paper... which on our sunny hot Christmas day means that half way through your meal you have bright red sweat running down your face. yip, all I wanted for Christmas for a red-stained face.
Crackers! Why on earth do we pay over R100 for wrapped up whistles, miniature playing cards (WTF must one do with those), spinning tops, fake teeth and a bunch of jokes that seriously only losers find funny.
I need to take a break now because my blood is beginning to boil and my heart is racing and I haven't even got to Christmas Lists yet.....
To be continued........
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