C is for Cruise

I’m going on a cruise.  I’m going cruising.  This time next week I’ll be out on the open sea.  No matter how many times I say it, I don’t get tired of using the word “cruise”.  In fact, I am going to try and wangle it into every sentence from today until I leave!

 I don’t want much in life, but for as long as I can remember all I’ve wanted to do is a) go on a cruise and b) go to an Island.  And now, low and behold, I’ll be sailing out into the horizon ON MY 37^th birthday! I am going on a CRUISE!

But even more exciting than this (if there can be anything more exciting right now) is the fact that I need to use my passport!  TaDa…. Finally I get to use my Passport!  This is a very big deal for me, I last used a Passport in 1992 (I was 18 years old).  My last Passport (as most of you know) expired without a single (SINGLE) stamp in it!  But this baby, my 2020 expiring Version is about to get its first (and definitely not last) stamp….. and it’s barely 2 months old! Thanks Bellville Home Affairs for your efficiency (oh and my very own Government Shuffler and her queuing skills), because without these 2 vital components we might not be able to put a “check” next to the all important “Do you have a valid Passport?” question. Cruise!

But even more exciting than this (yes it gets better), is that we got a really good deal on this cruise, so we’re saving some money (even though we are flying babysitters down form East London to look after the offspring – yip we are actually doing that). 

But back to the money….. since we are saving money, I figure the money we are saving can now be spent on getting me “Cruise Ready”.  The Husband doesn’t understand this logic.  He says why don’t we just save the money, smile that we got a good deal and move along swiftly.  But this is typical male logic.  It don’t work that way, Buddy.  In between all the last minute things that must get done (did I mention school starts smack in the middle of our CRUISE), I now need to purchase Cruise Wear, get Cruise Hair – I’m thinking natural looking sun-streaked highlights (I’m done counting and pulling out my “Beautiful White Hairs” as the Government Shuffler calls them), obviously I need a mani and pedi, a facial wouldn’t hurt and since I plan on spending all 4 days lying out on the deck soaking up the sun… I’d better throw in a Cruise Wax – with so many areas that need waxing, it might just save some time and have them dip me in a vat of wax all at once! 

                       One of the Pools on the Melody - pic taken from www.starlightcruises.co.za

In between all this, I need to buy and mark school supplies.  But I figure, that can wait.  The GS has 11 years of school left, there’s plenty of time to make it up to her if I send her to school on her first day without books, pencils etc.  I only get to go on a Cruise once.  No-one ever died from not having all their stationary there on the first day! Mamma’s going CRUISING!

Talking about being Cruise Ready involves acquiring whimsical nautical Cruise Wear, a necessity right now because I have a small wardrobe situation.  I have just returned from a 4 week holiday and as usual all my clothes have shrunk… So I’m thinking it’s either the East London water OR those pesky little things call Calories.  Now Calories are sneaky little buggers who apparently break into your cupboard at night and actually sew up your clothes – they particularly like the area around the hips, bum and thighs!  These little buggers don’t just sew up 1 pair of jeans, they’ll actually go through your clothes and sew up every one of your favourite “must wear” items.  Sometimes they are really spiteful and sew up the tummy area of your clothes – just for fun.  Little f&*(^ers! So needless to say I’m off to find myself some nautically inspired froks tomorrow and perhaps even a jean pant or 2!

Have I mentioned I’m going on a Cruise?  While I’m getting myself Cruise Ready it has occurred to me that with this deal our accommodation definitely isn’t going to be on the Premier Deck, our room number won’t start with “Executive Suite …” and I’m pretty sure that even though we are out at sea… there ain’t going to be a sea view for us!  I’m pretty comfortable that our room will have no natural light, a bed might fall from behind the door once we close it, the shower might be over the toilet and The Husband and I could be sharing a single bed (or simply take it in turns to sleep at night), but none of this matters.  I don’t plan on spending much time down in the bowels of the boat, I’m going to be doing, seeing, trying, tasting, drinking, experiencing, EVERYTHING there is to do on the boat.  Bingo?  I’m there!  Read in the Cigar Lounge – there!  Spend the money we’ve saved at the Casino – as good as done! Watch anorexic looking women parade around on a stage in skimpy outfits – there like a bear!  In fact if it’s on offer… I’m going to give it a try! I’m going on a Cruise people, I’m not going to swan around and pretend that the experience is old hat – I’m going to race around like a kid in a candy store – It’s going to be as obvious as a pimple on your nose that this is my FIRST CRUISE!

The Melody (the gorgeous ship that will be hosting us) has specially organised this particular cruise to leave on my Birthday…. They were also generous enough to organise a stop in Walvis Bay so that I am able to use my Passport – thanks Starlight Cruises (www.starlightcruises.co.za) So the way I figure it is this is a 4 day party for me attended by 1500 total strangers (well 1499 strangers – I know Ruth’s Mom who is also going on the cruise.)

This will be my last Blog because as you know, I’ll be on a Cruise for 4 days, starting on Monday! But I’ll be sure to fill you all in when I get back and will definitely post a pic of the all important stamp that I’ll be getting!

I’m going on a Cruise baby!