It has taken me almost 37 years to realise that people don’t spend nearly as much time talking about me as I thought they did – it was a sobering realisation! It was then confirmed by my “friend-with-a-life” at our Sports Day Breakfast, who in no uncertain terms said to me “I’d hate to break it to you, but you’re not THAT special” – when I told her about my recent epiphany. I was devastated…. all this time I had thought that other people’s worlds revolved solely around ME!
On a serious note though, when God dished out “Sensitive” and “Taking things personally”, I was up front and centre in the queue! I have wasted so much of my time (and energy) worrying about what everyone else is thinking, I've forgotten to actually just enjoy living life!
How many of us worry about what others will say about what we’re wearing, saying, doing, eating, our children’s manners, our children (period), our expanding waistline, and and and……. The list is endless! How many times have you been part of a conversation and although the person is talking about “someone” or “something”, you think they are actually talking about YOU!! Then you go home and stew for hours and hours about a conversation that was probably not even about you in the first place! Why do we do that to ourselves?
In his book, A New Earth, Eckhart Tolle, explains how ducks “flap their wings” after a fight to get rid of excess energy and then swim off peacefully together. That’s what I’ve decided to do…..when faced with a situation that would normally leave me wasting my time and energy “stewing” and “brewing” I’m going to “flap my wings” and move along swiftly. I'm choosing not to "sweat the small stuff".
My 5 year old son is very lucky to have a teacher with the right kind of attitude… her response to a catty comment at a recent 20 year school reunion was “The awesome thing about being me is that I don’t have to care what you think”.
I have decided that life is too short to waste my time worrying about what the proverbial "they" are thinking. At the end of the day, I want to be able to say “been there, done that, EXPERIENCED LIFE!”
Why does it take us nearly 40 years to wise up on these things? Just when your body starts falling apart...your mental self confidence takes over! :-)))
ReplyDeleteAgreed! I want to relive my 20's but with the wisdom I have now!
ReplyDeleteRecently I attended a seminar where they said you should physically wipe off the negativity that others deposit on us. Seems the ducks know a thing or two.
ReplyDeleteYip, i'm sure i was standing right next to you when "sensitivity" and "taking things personally" was dished out, but hey i'm learning from this blog and it's becoming so invigorating not to stress about irrelevant crap anymore. The beauty is that now when people start with negative converssation, one can so sweetly direct them to positive thinking, if all else fails, I just exclude my self from the company,I create a win win situation for myself :)
ReplyDeleteThanks for the refrence Bernadette .... To be honest I did have a fleeting moment of guilt when she looked totally stunned but I worked through the "guilt" by dancing even more!!! lol
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