This is true in more ways than one. Firstly, renewing my passport is one of the first steps I’ve taken on my B4-Forty journey and technically for anyone who travels, your journey generally starts at Home Affairs. Well, for everyone except my friend-with-a-life who “doesn’t do Home Affairs” and has someone COME TO HER HOUSE where fingers prints are done, forms filled out and payments are made all in the comfort of her own home with no doubt (in her case) a glass of wine in one hand and the YOU in the other! (… as much as I love my life, when I heard this story on Friday, the first thing out my mouth was “I WANT YOUR LIFE!”) … but I digress, we’re not all master delegators like her, so the Beckley clan were up at dawn on Saturday morning to check out Bellville Home Affairs!
(Before I start let me just say we had a great experience. We were there 40min before the doors opened, went in at 8:30 and out by 9:30. So by all accounts – not a bad day at the government office!)
This is what I learnt:
White People Can’t Queue
We arrived 40min before the doors officially opened and already the queue was snaking out the building. We took our rightful place at the back, but I did send the husband to check out how far back we were and where exactly the queue began. Once that was established, we waited. After maybe 30 seconds the kids started whining, then they were both starving (we had eaten breakfast maybe 20min earlier) and both needed the toilet?????? Now I don’t generally like to differentiate between race groups, but for the purpose of this piece it is necessary – so bear with me. I noticed that it was generally South Africans of my race that would walk to the front of the queue, sigh loudly, mumble, moan, glare and then reluctantly stand at the back… like standing at the back of a really long queue was the end of the known universe. Everyone else, arrived, children in tow, took up their place “at the back of the queue”, no sighing, no moaning, the queue was what it was. I realised then that I (and perhaps certain other people) are just not used to waiting in queues. I know I sigh when the queue at pick n pay has more than 3 people in front of me and I instantly scan around for a shorter queue, when I need to get medicine and I see more than 5 people in the queue, I go to another Clicks and try there! Maybe I’m wrong… but I just think we’re not used to waiting for things; we want things to happen NOW!
Information is Key
We arrived at Home Affairs with our photos in the correct format i.e. non-smiling, no caps, no hair in face, no personality). We had also filled out the correct forms, had certified copies of all the correct documents, in short, we were sorted – thanks to the wonders of the Internet! Because of this – we went straight to the Passport queue. However, the queue at “Information” was a mile long. So these poor people wait in that queue to enter the building, then wait in another queue to find out what they need, then in all likelihood need to go home and get the right documents, then come back and queue up again! Perhaps you’re wondering why they don’t just phone and enquire… well the husband phoned on our behalf on 12 different occasions and only got through once! Enough said.
The Government Shuffle
The funniest thing about queuing up with hordes of other people is that you have to do what I call the “government shuffle”! If you’re sitting on a bench and the person in front gets up then everyone sliiiiiiides along to their new position! Similarly at the payment section, the benches were replaced by chairs and each time a person got up everyone would move up one, like some new form of musical chairs but instead of someone losing a chair on each round, a chair was gained! It’s hilarious – but I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. Sliding along or getting up every few seconds was just too much for me.. so my poor daughter had to do it (I’m learning from my friend-with-a-life on how to delegate!). I stood at the side and when she reached the front, I joined her and went up to the counter. Next time you’re at a government department… look out for the “government shuffle” – CLASSIC!
Death and Marriage – one and the same!
One of the funniest things we saw (and I still can’t believe I didn’t take a photo – I might just need to go back in order to get one!) is that that the queue for registering Deaths and Marriages is the same! They had all these signs where they explained the various sections and what you do where and true as bob – they lumped Death and Marriage in one! So hey… whether you’re there to register a death or your marriage in the eyes of Home Affairs – it’s pretty much the same thing! Ha ha
But in all fairness, our experience at Bellville was surprisingly pleasant. Friendly people, they opened on time, it was relatively quick and painless (for us anyway) – so now all we do is wait for the passports!
We could have driven out to Malmesbury, like most Capetonians seem to do and walked in and out their Home Affairs office in 10 minutes but I’m glad we didn’t. Going to Bellville reminded me again how much we take for granted and that standing in a long queue really isn’t the end of the world and the next time I’m faced with that prospect instead of looking around for a shorter queue, I’m going to enjoy the extra 5min I have to spend just standing around doing NOTHING!!
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